Sometimes the best technique is to ignore the student's misbehavior who is trying to get your attention. It takes the student's fun away, if I don't react. Another method is to walk over to their desk and ask if they need help with the assignment. Always remember to smile. With my classes this year there are not many students who try to "get to me." A teacher's favorite kind of students!!
I don't often let a student "get to me" because that would mean that they have won the fight, and I am not willing to let their behavior bother me. I share with them the consequences of not following my directions and how I would rather they didn't have to stay after school too, but that is their choice by the actions the chose to use. Then if they do stay, I talk with them about their behavior and talk to their parents also. It is not always easy because some students are not easy to relate to, but getting frustrated is not the best plan of attack.
I agree with my mom. Sharing with them the consequences of their actions and giving them choices put the ball back in the student's court. Also, making clear, consistent expectations and procedures ensures students will not test the limits because they already know them. Lastly, if a student does make a bad choice, don't harbor ill feelings toward them and continue to punish them. Students are very perceptive and will know.
Teachers can not let students see us upset because we are the teachers. They need to see us keep our control, or we are letting them control us and the situation. Mandt training talks a lot about this. Adults must keep their focus and control even when a student is out of control, or they can escalate the situation. Our control can actually help to calm them down. Students need to know there are consequences for their actions, and that a teacher will follow through with what they say they will do.
One of the biggest aids in not letting a student get to you is taking care of any situation early on. If someone is having a bad day, struggling with maintaining their control, or just being a kid, talking to them about what you need them to do often helps. If they are starting to get worked up or out of control, simply saying something like "I know you're not happy right now, but I need you to settle down a little before you make a poor decision" or "if you need to talk about something, why don't we do that in a little while when you're not so upset" will help. If they are at a point beyond simple re-directing, making sure they know any upcoming consequences may help also. In general trying to handle these situations in as private a setting as possible keeps things from getting too wound up, and takes away some of the "putting on a show" aspect for some students.
There is a phrase that I have found to be effective when handling minor discipline issues in the classroom. For example, if a student uses inappropriate language, I can calmly remind them that they are "better than that." This can catch them off guard and sort of diffuse the situation.
This simple phrase lets them know that the language is unacceptable, but also conveys that you value them enough to expect them to make better decisions.
Every year, some students think they have to try to see how far they can push certain teachers. The best thing that a teacher can do is keep the focus on the lesson and not on the student. If a teacher lets it turn into a "game" then a power struggle develops. Take care of the situation early on by visiting with the student. Try to find out what is causing them to need the extra attention in front of their peers.
I am really a very calm person, but there are times when students "try" to get to you. Remaining calm or like the book suggests, counting to ten can be a reliever. Never get into a power struggle because you will look just as ridiculous as the student and both come out looking like a fool. Step away from the situation, remain calm, then deal with the situation when you are both calm.
Since I have had the opportunity of raising a special needs child, I should have "control" down to a science. Unfortunately this isn't always the case!
I try to take my own advice...I am the only one that can control my day and how I feel. If I let a student get to me and can't shake it, it's my own fault.
As a teacher, I try to ignore any behavior that would diffuse without attention. Most of the time this works. If I do loose my cool with a student, I try to do it privately. Sometimes I think it's okay for them to see that you are upset. It makes us all human. I also think it's important for the student to know that you are upset with the behavior and not the student. We are all human. We all make mistakes. School faculty and staff make hundreds of decisions a day based on student behaviors. Sometimes we get it wrong. When that happens we do what we expect our students to do...own up to the mistake, apologize, and learn from the encounter. Reflect and learn.
Over the years and with the many students that have passed my doorway, there are some who surely have tried to get under my skin. I try to defuse the situations by realizing that I am in control of my reactions and the situation is only for attention. The book suggest counting to 10, I find myself moving on and ignoring the situation or removing the problem from the rest of the class.
I would have to say being a parent and a teacher has taught me a lot about being patient and picking my battles. I have a number of other students in the classroom that are willing to work hard and the one student who is acting out is doing this for a reason. I find talking to the student one on one generally shows this student that I am willing to work with him/her to help them be successful in my classroom and else where. If it becomes a distraction for the rest of the class then I ask the student to leave the classroom but this has only happened twice in the last five years.
Sometimes you have to pick your battles. This doesn’t mean letting up on your discipline policy, but rather taking a second to understand what it is really about.
We as teachers must be confident we are in control of our class. Students lead on to our frustrations. Confrontation with a student in private seems to work for me the best. I remember a professor in college telling us you must focus on the other twenty students and not let the one student get the best of you.
When students' behavior starts to "get to me" I take a deep breath, count to ten and then address the class in a very low, calm voice. I slow down and think of what I'm going to say. No one wins in a power struggle. The students need me to be in control at all times. I am the adult and I am responsible for establishing and maintaining a safe, non-threatening classroom environment. This is my mantra. I will continue to say and do it...wish me luck.
Sometimes the best technique is to ignore the student's misbehavior who is trying to get your attention. It takes the student's fun away, if I don't react. Another method is to walk over to their desk and ask if they need help with the assignment. Always remember to smile. With my classes this year there are not many students who try to "get to me." A teacher's favorite kind of students!!
ReplyDeleteI don't often let a student "get to me" because that would mean that they have won the fight, and I am not willing to let their behavior bother me. I share with them the consequences of not following my directions and how I would rather they didn't have to stay after school too, but that is their choice by the actions the chose to use. Then if they do stay, I talk with them about their behavior and talk to their parents also. It is not always easy because some students are not easy to relate to, but getting frustrated is not the best plan of attack.
ReplyDeleteI agree with my mom. Sharing with them the consequences of their actions and giving them choices put the ball back in the student's court. Also, making clear, consistent expectations and procedures ensures students will not test the limits because they already know them. Lastly, if a student does make a bad choice, don't harbor ill feelings toward them and continue to punish them. Students are very perceptive and will know.
ReplyDeleteTeachers can not let students see us upset because we are the teachers. They need to see us keep our control, or we are letting them control us and the situation. Mandt training talks a lot about this. Adults must keep their focus and control even when a student is out of control, or they can escalate the situation. Our control can actually help to calm them down. Students need to know there are consequences for their actions, and that a teacher will follow through with what they say they will do.
ReplyDeleteOne of the biggest aids in not letting a student get to you is taking care of any situation early on. If someone is having a bad day, struggling with maintaining their control, or just being a kid, talking to them about what you need them to do often helps. If they are starting to get worked up or out of control, simply saying something like "I know you're not happy right now, but I need you to settle down a little before you make a poor decision" or "if you need to talk about something, why don't we do that in a little while when you're not so upset" will help. If they are at a point beyond simple re-directing, making sure they know any upcoming consequences may help also. In general trying to handle these situations in as private a setting as possible keeps things from getting too wound up, and takes away some of the "putting on a show" aspect for some students.
ReplyDeleteThere is a phrase that I have found to be effective when handling minor discipline issues in the classroom. For example, if a student uses inappropriate language, I can calmly remind them that they are "better than that." This can catch them off guard and sort of diffuse the situation.
ReplyDeleteThis simple phrase lets them know that the language is unacceptable, but also conveys that you value them enough to expect them to make better decisions.
Every year, some students think they have to try to see how far they can push certain teachers. The best thing that a teacher can do is keep the focus on the lesson and not on the student. If a teacher lets it turn into a "game" then a power struggle develops. Take care of the situation early on by visiting with the student. Try to find out what is causing them to need the extra attention in front of their peers.
ReplyDeleteI am really a very calm person, but there are times when students "try" to get to you. Remaining calm or like the book suggests, counting to ten can be a reliever. Never get into a power struggle because you will look just as ridiculous as the student and both come out looking like a fool. Step away from the situation, remain calm, then deal with the situation when you are both calm.
ReplyDeleteSince I have had the opportunity of raising a special needs child, I should have "control" down to a science. Unfortunately this isn't always the case!
ReplyDeleteI try to take my own advice...I am the only one that can control my day and how I feel. If I let a student get to me and can't shake it, it's my own fault.
As a teacher, I try to ignore any behavior that would diffuse without attention. Most of the time this works. If I do loose my cool with a student, I try to do it privately. Sometimes I think it's okay for them to see that you are upset. It makes us all human. I also think it's important for the student to know that you are upset with the behavior and not the student. We are all human. We all make mistakes. School faculty and staff make hundreds of decisions a day based on student behaviors. Sometimes we get it wrong. When that happens we do what we expect our students to do...own up to the mistake, apologize, and learn from the encounter. Reflect and learn.
Over the years and with the many students that have passed my doorway, there are some who surely have tried to get under my skin. I try to defuse the situations by realizing that I am in control of my reactions and the situation is only for attention. The book suggest counting to 10, I find myself moving on and ignoring the situation or removing the problem from the rest of the class.
ReplyDeleteI would have to say being a parent and a teacher has taught me a lot about being patient and picking my battles. I have a number of other students in the classroom that are willing to work hard and the one student who is acting out is doing this for a reason. I find talking to the student one on one generally shows this student that I am willing to work with him/her to help them be successful in my classroom and else where. If it becomes a distraction for the rest of the class then I ask the student to leave the classroom but this has only happened twice in the last five years.
ReplyDeleteSometimes you have to pick your battles. This doesn’t mean letting up on your discipline policy, but rather taking a second to understand what it is really about.
ReplyDeleteWe as teachers must be confident we are in control of our class. Students lead on to our frustrations. Confrontation with a student in private seems to work for me the best. I remember a professor in college telling us you must focus on the other twenty students and not let the one student get the best of you.
When students' behavior starts to "get to me" I take a deep breath, count to ten and then address the class in a very low, calm voice. I slow down and think of what I'm going to say. No one wins in a power struggle. The students need me to be in control at all times. I am the adult and I am responsible for establishing and maintaining a safe, non-threatening classroom environment. This is my mantra. I will continue to say and do it...wish me luck.
ReplyDelete